In love with the wrong guy.

Love is the most deepest word that weigh heavy meaning. We often use the word LOVE to our family, friends, to our boyfriend or girlfriend, to God, to everyone. Actually, LOVE is the ultimate beginning and end why we live and survive, why we are here in this world and why we still striving to go on with life. There are various reasons and degree in depths why people love, such for example, the initiate boy-girl relationship. Probably, that is what makes the world go round.

Frankly, I have been totally in love ("Obsessed" as what my friends say). I know we were not fit right from the start. Probably, he is wrong for me. But I'm waiting for a miracle that sudden positive change may forever take place. It is just I'm in the softer side, accumulating all the worst in him for miracle to happen. All the understanding, all the patience, all the love, pause my love not because I know that he needs me to direct his life. I do love him. We love each other. But time comes that I'm already tired. I'm tired of being always on the softer side. I'm tired of his vices, his bragging disbelief, his false promises. I'm totally tired.

That is why, I'm awaken to my senses. I'm awaken from the reality of prolong silence and sleep from the truth. I'm opening wide my eyes and focusing my mind to swallow my "undying love" for him. For long years, we love each other but I come up with a decision. It's totally over!

The best life's lesson that holds me now is this nourishing words which my friend shared me. It says:

"People have different outlooks in love. But whatever those are, there's only a single truth behind everyone's heartache: Love hurts when God knows you deserve someone else."

My reflection about a prayer.

"Do not thing of the few things you did not get after praying. Think of the countless beautiful things God gave without your asking."

I do admit that I often pray to the Lord, asking Him to have me like this and like that, to have me these and those. I pray for Him for many things and various concerns. I ask much blessings for our family, our plans, our health and our future life.

Oftentimes too, I wonder why I haven't receive the ones I've prayed. And it leads now thinking, maybe God doesn't want me to have what I've asked for now or probably, He doesn't want me to have then because it might bring bad to me. But the solid hold of what I always trust is the saying that goes, "Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it." Actually this saying holds true in most cases of my life.

And the perfect thing i have discovered, for every thing - little or big that you do to the least of your brothers, God will never skip to give you a reward, blessings that you can't even count them. They're numerously unmeasurable. And in everything you do, you will always prosper and if you think it's tough to cross the many impossible ways, you'll be amazed that God lightens them.

That is why, in everything you do, seek His will and He will surely lighten and direct every paths.